Late last season, we debuted a brand-new feature here at The Royal Half... "Know Your Opponent." And the reviews were... um... well... um... interesting. Brigitte from One Girl, One Puck has a very unique ability when it comes to in-depth previews of the upcoming opponents of the Los Angeles Kings. So I figured we would continue to have her take a look at the big LA Kings matchups during this NHL Half Season. In case none of you have read Brigitte before, her is a photo of her to help get you acquainted!
A few TRH related items that might have passed you by the last few days. There are two... count them, two brand new All The Kings Men Podcasts for your listening pleasure! First, Jesse Cohen and John Hoven from Mayor's Manor chat with me about the Kevin Westgarth trade and the boring world of waivers.
No, we aren't changing the name of this blog. But it looks like we are getting the band back together!!!
LET'S PLAY SOME HOCKEY!!!
Let's be honest here.... the Lockout sucked. Sure, I may not have been posting as much as you would all have liked me to... but over the course of the 113 days of the NHL Lockout, I was able to complete the most difficult accomplishment for any hockey blogger.... a TRH HAT TRICK!!!
While watching my 187th Vintage Hockey Game during the lockout, I stumbled upon Fox Sports West re-airing of the classic LA Kings - Toronto Maple Leafs Conference Finals Game 6 and 7. And I began to Tweet out all the memories that were flooding back to me from that amazing series. And that led to this Tweet from 2-Time Stanley Cup Champion, Colin Fraser.
@theroyalhalf I can't wait to see what you tweet about me in 20 years
When December 21st, 2012 came and went without the slightest threat of the end of the world, I Tweeted out the above to remind recent LA Kings fans of the real apocalypse... Denis Gauthier and Randy Jones patrolling the LA Kings blueline.
So much history in just one photo.
Within 24 hours, I received a reply from Monsieur Gauthier:
@theroyalhalf What # were you again funny guy?Oh ya,you never played.My bad!
As the old adage goes... When there is nothing left to Tweet about... just make fun of the Columbus Blue Jackets. So when the Lockout continued deep into December, I Tweeted out one of the oldest "Blue Jackets During a Lockout" jokes in the book. And as it turns out... apparently the LA Kings shipped over their Social Media Department to Columbus in the Jack Johnson trade.
Oh, Helene... you so crazy.
No... seriously... you are mentally unstable.
The 2013 NHL Season is only a week and a half away... so we don't need to talk about silly things like Twitter anymore... no, we can talk about what brings us to the rink each and every day... DOWNLOADABLE WALLPAPERS WITH IDIOTIC THEMES FROM YOUR FAVORITE OVERPAID HOCKEY DEFENSEMEN!!!
Oh man... this is a hysterical photoshop that is obviously done with total sarcasm
and in no way could be rea... WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT???
So, um... maybe I was too busy at the end of last season watching my favorite hockey team win the Stanley Cup to notice that apparently this #ControlledChaos is actually a real thing:
Johnson said playing with fellow American defenseman James Wisniewski has helped the transition immensely, and the two have become fast friends on and off the ice. He said they refer to their defense pairing as “controlled chaos,” among a list of other names they’ve come up with in their six games together.
Look, if Jack Johnson and James Wisniewski are going to try and create some iconic brand of two close friends who are big guys playing their sport... then I suggest a more retro theme than the #ControlledChaos poster above.
STEP 4: Get a Direct Message from the journalist you made the dumb joke about 15 minutes later.
Hey... at least I spelled "Helene" right.
When Helene Elliott isn't busy writing me sarcastic Direct Messages via Twitter... she's busy writing touching tributes via the Los Angeles Times about the passing of long-time Los Angeles Kings PA Announcer, David Courtney.
When David Courtney passed away last week... it was the first time I've felt actual anger and frustration with the NHL Lockout. Here is a guy who dedicated his life to his work. Public Address announcing was his passion. And because a bunch of rich guys couldn't figure things out with a bunch of other rich guys... David Courtney was denied the chance to work the Los Angeles Kings Stanley Cup Banner Ceremony that was scheduled to take place Friday, October 12th. I only had one brief interaction with David when he was the PA Announcer for the Los Angeles Kings Fantasy Camp that I participated in earlier this year. Of course, my team was playing in the Championship game and David went around to each player to make sure he had the correct pronunciation of their names. A true professional... no matter what the venue.
That is one bad-ass photograph.
Earlier this week, Jesse Cohen and myself attempted to pay tribute to David Courtney via All The Kings Men Podcast. You can check out this episode of All The Kings Men here, subscribe to it on iTunes or listen below.
File this blog post under "Shit We Would Never Talk About If The NHL Was Playing Games Regularly." Jesse Cohen, John Hoven from Mayors Manor and myself break down the 5 Best & the 5 Worst NHL Team Songs as found by Jesse Cohen on the internet during All The Kings Men Podcast Presents: "Locktober." I have no idea what it all means either, but Jesse was borderline obsessed with the NHL Team Songs that he found on YouTube so we spent nearly 29 minutes talking about it. Please... NHL... come back soon.
You can check out the latest All The Kings Men here, subscribe to it on iTunes or listen below.
Also... Jesse has published a full listing of the songs we are talking about in this podcast. And even though I selected the New Jersey Devils' song on the podcast for a cheap joke (at 5min and 35 seconds, the Devils song lasted longer than the Devils chances of winning the 2012 Stanley Cup Finals)... really, the worst team song comes from the only California team to not win the Stanley Cup:
I know that I get criticized a lot for not being a "true" Los Angeles Kings fan. That sometimes... god forbid... I might dare to question the quality of the product that my favorite professional ice hockey team is putting out on the ice. Well, fear not dedicated and true LA Kings fans... for at least once a year... I am one of you. Over the past few seasons, no matter what the outlook for the team heading into the regular season has been... I've placed a $100 bet on the Los Angeles Kings to win the Stanley Cup. That's right... even when the Kings were about to embark on their 71 point campaign of 2007-08... I laid down a cool Benjamin in blind support of my favorite hockey team to win it all. So imagine my surprise in mid-August when waking up from a Stanley Cup-induced hangover... I found this in my pocket.
It's faded because I'm pretty sure that I used it to wipe my tears by accident during Game 6.
Indiana Matt found himself in Las Vegas in mid-July of 2011 and placed what I'm sure he thought at the time was a total suckers bet for me on the LA Kings to win the Stanley Cup at 12 to 1 odds. Honestly, in the madness of the LA Kings actually winning the Stanley Cup... I had totally forgotten about this Golden Ticket. And since the NHL and NHLPA have combined to completely deny me the chance to claim this ticket in person at Frozen Fury in Las Vegas... I mailed the ticket into the Venetian in early October and then a few weeks later received this:
The only thing better than the LA Kings winning the Stanley Cup? Winning money for the LA Kings winning the Stanley Cup!
So here we are... day 59 into the NHL Lockout and I've got $1300 dollars in my pocket. What ever could I spend that money on?!?
All apologies for the infrequent posts on The Royal Half... be lets be honest. There isn't much to talk about. So make sure that you are following me on Twitter... because that is where the real hot TRH action is going on right now... with gems like these:
Step aside Aki Berg... Alec Martinez getting hit in the face with a puck is now the worst Finnish thing to ever happen to the LA Kings.
The best side effect of the NHL Lockout dragging on 59 days? I've been getting plenty of time to read great books about hockey. Make sure you check outBreakaway: From Behind the Iron Curtain to the NHL: The Untold Story of Hockey’s Great Escapes. While reading it I learned that the first Russian-born player to ever play in the NHL was Victor Nechayev for your Los Angeles Kings.
Luckily, I've been able to intercept the official Los Angeles Kings Beat Reporter Questionnaire (waaay before Down Goes Brown) and hopefully it will shed some light on who exactly will step into Rich Hammond's ill-fitted suit.
Believe it or not... but I've become some sort of a regular guest on The War Room on the SiriusXM's NHL Network. It's always fun to chat with Peter Berce and Mick Kern... and this past Thursday I joined them to discuss how perfect it is that the season immediately following the Los Angeles Kings Stanley Cup victory is probably going to be cancelled. Check it out below.
You can check out past appearances on The War Room under the TRH RADIO tab on the sidebar.
Friday, October 12th at around 7:30pm me and my Half Season Ticket Holder Buddy were supposed to be in our seats at Staples Center for our 10th consecutive Los Angeles Kings Opening Night as Half Season Ticket Holders. The 1st home game of a new NHL season is always a great affair. Catching up with old friends, chatting with season ticket neighbors and of course... watching your favorite hockey team's 1st ever Stanley Cup Banner be raised to the rafters.
Ha... suck it, LA Sparks... just one more championship and we are finally tied with you!!!
So while Los Angeles Kings fans everywhere wait until there is some sort of settlement between the NHL owners and players, there is no reason the LA Kings Stanley Cup Banner should remain in storage. No, instead the LA Kings Marketing Department has figured out a few practical options for the Stanley Cup Banner until it can be placed in its proper home.
But in the meantime... like most of the NHL, I guess it could always go hang out in Russia for the season.
It's Locktober here at The Royal Half and All The Kings Men Podcast!!! So that means we are doing an unprecedented podcasting event where Jesse Cohen and I talk with 30 NHL bloggers from 30 NHL teams in 30 Nights (hopefully!). Jesse and I are really excited about All The Kings Men Locktober... but let's be honest... we are hoping we'll have to kill it in a few days once the NHL and NHLPA announce a new CBA and the season is saved. Yeah, right.