So the good folks at Bloguin have created a "smart phone" app for all of the blogs on their site. So if you haven't already added The Royal Half to your internet bookmarks, or subscribed to our RSS feed in your reader, or added us on Twitter... then this is the app for you... ? But honestly, you might just want to walk away from The Royal Half for a few hours each day and stop staring at Heidi Androl screengrabs. You sicko.

You can download the apps in iPhone and Android flavors here. (Or click on the giant Royal Half logo on the side bar) Sorry, Half Season Ticket Holder Buddy, no Katana II version!

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In other, non-phone related, but just as lame news... the Fabulous Forum blog over at something called the Los Angeles Times (I think it's an internet news site of some sort) is having a contest where readers get to choose which Los Angeles based sports team they would want kicked out of Los Angeles. Not quite sure what the point is here... especially when cities have to deal with this issue every single day. Here is the voting as of 8:30pm Monday night.

Really, Los Angeles? 1552 votes for the Kings? And only 205 votes for the Sparks? Is it because the Sparks have more championship banners at Staples Center than the Kings do? Look, if I'm flying off the island on Lost, and I need to drop one sports team off the helicopter so we can make it to the ship... then I'm looking your way Sparks or Chivas USA! (Let's not even discuss the fact that the Angels are based in a different city.) So what do you say... readers of The Royal Half... let's head over to this site and cast a vote for a non-hockey sports franchise. I think the 13 votes will definitely swing the momentum.

It twas the night before Valentine's Day at Staples Center and there was love flowing all throughout the arena. There was Half Season Ticket Holder Buddy bringing his wife to the game to cap off a day of Valentine Celebrations... there was a solid 60 minute effort from the Los Angeles Kings that their fans couldn't do anything else but be in love with... and I saw just about the most perfect a couple I've ever seen at a Kings game...

Sakic and Forsberg. Now that's love. 
I guess the Kings equivalent would be a couple wearing Simmonds and Moller jerseys.

Kings 3, Av's 0

Sure the Colorado Avalanche were tired. They had played at home the night before.. and they looked like. So this time, the Kings came out strong against a team that it should be strong against and pretty much controlled the game the entire night. The only real revelation to come out of the game Saturday night was the solid effort of new Kings agitator, Dick Clune. Clune was the Kings payment for the failed #1 draft pick that was Lauri Tukonen and he's had a difficult road to the NHL the past 2 seasons. Clune looked like Sean Avery-lite out there... but as I overheard from a respected hockey source... "without the turtle power."

The Richardson-Simmonds-Clune line.
Now with 100% less Parse.

It's always fun when the Av's and Kings get together, mainly because of the history between these 2 teams.

Kyle Quincey gets a brief remembrance of what it was like to work under the lights of Hollywood.

There have also been quite a few amazing players traded back and forth between Denver and Los Angeles.

Boy, this guy is going to be disappointed when he sees the Av's starting lineup.

And of course, the biggest connection between Denver and Los Angeles... recording artist Deborah Gibson.

I'll have my bombs burst in her air anytime.

So not only was Deborah Gibson rocking a 3rd jersey handkerchief around her midsection, but the Kings 3rd Jersey Logo was featured prominently in the giveaway for the night... the Kings Olympic Poster!

I think it's time that Kings fans start to realize that the 3rd Jersey will become the primary jersey for the team next season. It's been slowly creeping it's way into the Kings ecosystem... the Olympic Poster... the Team LA store was featuring a brand new foam finger with the 3rd Jersey Logo on it... and last Tuesday against the Anaheim Ducks, Fox Sports Prime Ticket HD featured the logo as a graphic wipe within its telecast.

At the end of the day. I don't care what jersey this team is wearing... as long as they are winning in it. But let's be honest... I really wish they were playing in this one:

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Check out youtube user, Disengage, for some of the most amazing hockey videos I've ever seen... some are even non-Kings 3rd Jersey related!

So here starts the NHL Olympic Break. Apparently, any wins that Jon Quick gets as a member of Team USA do not count towards his LA Kings totals. I think that's bullshit. Even if it's against Latvia. So you'll have to wait until March 2nd to see if Quick can best Mario Lessards team record of 34 wins. I'm thinking there is a pretty, pretty, pretty good chance he beats that.

For all things Av's related, check out the amazing Jibblescribbits and of course, the star of the last episode of Upper Body Injury, Anyone But Detroit.

Considering that the Colorado Avalanche have only been in existence 15 years, there is a good amount of history between the Av's and the Los Angeles Kings. These teams meet each pre-season in Las Vegas for a rip-roaring good time... one of the biggest trades in Kings history went down between these two teams (yes, I'm talking about Brad Richardson for a 2008 2nd Rounder)... they've shared the same well-coiffed coach... and not many people realize that back when the Kings still made the playoffs (over 6 years ago and counting!) they played two excellent 7 game series back to back against the Av's.

This is what pretty much most of the 00's looked like when playing the Av's.
Except without Peter Harrold and Kyle Quincey.

I've kind of always had a soft spot in my hockey heart for the Avalanche. I think it's because one of my closest friends went to Denver University and called me one night saying "Dude... I'm at a frat party... and Forsberg, Deadmarsh and Foote just walked in." This was during their first season in Denver. I've even said that Peter Forsberg was the best center of the past decade. (But taking his spleen from him in 2001 is definitely one of my highlights as a Kings fan) The Avalanche have been a superior NHL franchise... so it's no surprise that their re-build only took 1 year. Thought to be one of the bottom-dwellers in the Western Conference at the start of this season, the Av's currently sit tied with the Kings for 5th in the Western Conference. And it's really surprising that Saturday night at Staples Center will be the first time these 2 teams have met all season. A few weeks ago over at The Olympic Hockey Blog, I co-blogged (?) an article about Jon Quick and Craig Anderson with Sean from Anyone but Detroit. To find out what Sean thinks of Brian Willsie's ability to play in the NHL again or the Av's in-ability to market their young team... check out the latest installment of "Upper Body Injury" (you can see past installments here, here and here) after the jump!

Hey, Los Angeles Kings organization... if you are going to send something like this out in mid-February:

You better make sure you don't lose a game to the NHL's worst team the same night.

Sure the Kings were able to rally with 5 minutes left and at least salvage a point, but wow, was this a stinker of a game. The Kings just didn't look interested until halfway through the 3rd period. And you know what? Don't give me this crap about facing a 6'4", left-handed goaltender and how hard it is to score against him. Jeff Deslauriers had only won 4 of his last 15 games... so some NHL teams have been able to figure out how to score against him!

Duh... just go 5-hole.

So the Kings lost on Wayne Simmonds bobblehead night which was a slap in the face to the Kings' Black History Month celebration that was going on during the broadcast last night. So let me get this straight... the dude who has been a reporter at Fox Sports for a few years gets to interview Wayne Simmonds...

...while the contestant from The Apprentice gets to interview Willie O'Ree, the NHL's first Black player?

Heidi ended the interview by saying "You've touched over 45,000 boys and girls."
Might want to add "the lives of" in there next time, Heidi.

The Kings were also showcasing their "Hockey is For Everyone" community efforts throughout the game last night.

If a 5'8" dude can score 30 goals in the NHL, then yes, hockey IS for everyone.

And to show that the Kings are totally inclusive as a franchise... they even allowed the maniac commenters over at Kings Insider to be let into the building.

Worst episode of Romper Room ever!

But the biggest thing to come out of last nights game against the Oilers was a new motivational technique from Coach Terry Murray. With a young team, Coach Murray has to make sure his players stay focused and learn from their mistakes. So last night he set up a test... if you committed a penalty during the game, you had to sit in the penalty box and stare at a Davis Drewiske player card... until you felt shame.

Davis is purty.

I will not become Drewiske. I will not become Drewiske. 
I will NOT become Drewiske.

I don't give a fuck I'm not staring at that thing.

And as legend has it... for the chosen one... the Drewiske will disappear.

For all the Oilers news and notes (and to hear to faint sound of cheering coming from Alberta) check out Low on Oil and JeanShortsAndBaggedMilk. For a graphic representation of how the 10 round shootout ended... check out below.

The Kings finish up on Saturday against the Colorado Avalanche before heading into the 2 week NHL shutdown caused by some international tournament in Europe or something. The Royal Half will be there to wish our boys good luck before heading overseas.

My friend Jay over at Low on Oil is facing a dilemma this NHL season that The Royal Half knows all too well... how to get excited about blogging for your favorite hockey team that just happens to be the worst in the NHL. Sure, the Los Angeles Kings are looking pretty right now... sitting in 5th place in the Western Conference... but let's not forget that this franchise hasn't seen the playoffs in the last 6 seasons or at all in 11 of the past 15 years. Having a playoff spot secured in mid-February means nothing in the NHL... just ask the 2003-2004 Los Angeles Kings that had a playoff spot within reach on March 14th... and then proceeded to lose 11 straight games. So for Jay... this season, his Edmonton Oilers are the worst team in the NHL.

"Did you see that goal?"
"No."
"Me neither." 
"Is Mirtle going to respond to my tweet or what! Jeez!"

The Oilers aren't any better off than the Kings when it comes to the playoffs over the past 7 years. The Oilers have only made the playoffs twice in that time... but one of those playoff trips happened to be to the Stanley Cup Finals. It's not like the Oilers have been bad... but much like the Los Angeles Kings of the early 90's, the Oilers have fallen into the "black hole" theory of NHL teams... not good enough to make the playoffs, but not bad enough to get a Top 5 draft pick. In fact, the Oilers haven't had a Top 5 pick since 1994... when they selected the veteran of 79 NHL games, Jason Bonsignore, with the #4 pick overall. (FYI, Ryan Smyth was selected with the 6th overall pick in that same draft by the Oilers... so that wasn't too shabby.)

M.I.T.  Mullet in Training.

But enough about the past, let's talk about the present. The Oilers are in town on Thursday night to take on the Kings and it's been a tough season for the Oilers... there's been injuries, more injuries, questionable goalie signings, some injuries and a winless January. All things that as a long-time Kings fan and blogger... I've gone through specifically over the last 4 years. (Instead of January, it's been the month of December for the Kings) So without further ado... here are The Royal Half's 5 tips on how to blog about a horrible NHL team! Check it out after the jump!

Luckily, for the Kings, the streak was the only thing that was snapped Monday night.

Kings 2, Ducks 4

I've been battling a bad cold the last few days... so I was only able to watch the Kings-Ducks game from beneath a few blankets and not from TRH2000 Headquarters. But at least I've been fighting this cold better than the Kings fought the Ducks on Monday night. Man, what a stinker! But look... every streak has to come to an end eventually... unless, of course, you are the Washington Capitals.

As we wait for the Los Angeles Kings to start a new streak Thursday night against the Oilers, check out McSwarley's for a great re-cap of what it feels like to watch the Kings play from the comfort of the hotel lobby better known as the Arrowhead Pond Honda Center.

Saturday afternoon I headed to Staples Center with Half Season Ticket Holder Buddy, Half Season Ticket Holder Buddy Father-In-Law and our friend Jesse. HSTHB Father-In-Law is a big Kings fan, but for the last 2 seasons, he hasn't bought a ticket package. HSTHB bought the ticket for his Father-In-Law as a birthday present, but when he purchased the ticket, we had no idea that the 4 of us would have the possibility of being part of Los Angeles Kings history, as the Kings could set a franchise record with a 9th straight win. And when the Detroit Red Wings took a 3-0 lead in the first period... we were pretty sure we weren't going to witness Kings history. But you see, in November of 2007, HSTHB Father-In-Law went to a Kings-Dallas Stars game with his lovely wife. When the Kings were down 4-0 after 2 periods, they decided to head home. The Kings would storm back to a 6-5 overtime victory which has earned the nickname "The Royal Rebound" amongst Kings fans. If anyone had the hope that the Kings would win this game against the Red Wings, it was HSTHB Father-In-Law... because he sure wasn't leaving early this time.

I want Michal Handzus to play for the Kings forever.

Kings 4, Red Wings 3, Kings History, Made

So the Los Angeles Kings win their 9th game in a row and beat the franchise record set by the Wayne Gretzky led 1991-1992 team. (Yes, I know the 1972-1973 team also won 8 in a row, but we are talking modern Kings era here!) It was great that Kings came back to win after being down 3-0... and even better that it was against the hated Detroit Red Wings. The Red Wings really have been the Kings nemesis over the past 10 years, but at least this fan has found a great way to love both teams.

I was kinda hoping she'd have split the Kings and Penguins.

With the 9 game winning streak taking its place in the Hall of Records for the 2009-2010 Los Angeles Kings, I thought it would be a good idea to look back at the 1991-1992 Kings team and see just how much had changed. Check it out after the jump.

Well, the Ilya Kovalchuk trade finally went down tonight before the Los Angeles Kings game against their cross-freeway rivals, the Anaheim Ducks. For a few weeks, speculation has ran wild that some combination of Dustin Brown, Jack Johnson and Wayne Simmonds was what it would take to pry one of the NHL's premiere snipers away from Atlanta. So how did those 3 Kings do tonight?

Yeah, I'd say GM Dean Lombardi made the right call.

Kings 6, Ducks 4, Kings' Young Prospects, Safe

The only thing better than perpetual trade bait Simmonds, Brown and Johnson having excellent games was the fact that Anze Kopitar is a King for 7 more years. Kopitar had 2 beautiful goals and 2 beautiful assists tonight and he is now the 10th leading scorer in the NHL. Oh, and he also happens to lead the NHL with 27 Power Play points. Anze has been playing so well lately that Fox Sports West HD actually got a cash infusion to create a new graphic for Kopitar.

Money well spent, FSW HD.

But let's be honest here. Sure Kopitar has 15 points in 8 games (the same 8 games in a row that the Kings have won) but the real story tonight were the guys who might have been on the chopping trading block... if Kings GM Dean Lombardi wasn't such a cool customer.

And after all the trouble that's gone down over the past 2 weeks between Dean Lombardi and Jack Johnson, tonight a message was definitely sent by the Indiana-born defenseman.

Honestly, I was never worried that Dustin Brown was going to be traded. I mean... he's the Captain. (Although trading their Captain has turned out pretty, pretty, pretty good for the Washington Capitals.) So when Dustin Brown scored the game winning goal tonight, giving the Los Angeles Kings their 8th win in a row, tying a franchise record set back in the day of Wayne Gretzky... what did he do to celebrate?

He shrugged his shoulders and basically said "What, me worry?"

So when the Kings are playing better than they have over the past 7 years... and are 4th overall in the Western Conference... and seem to have incredible team chemistry... what move do you make in order to show how far they've come as a team?

Why you bring former King Jeremy Roenick into your broadcast booth of course!

Bringing JR into the fold as an analyst for the Los Angeles Kings would be like seeing Kevin Brown on a Dodgers telecast or Ryan Leaf down on the sidelines reporting for the San Diego Chargers. In other words... it's just wrong. It's super annoying how Jeremy Roenick positions himself as "The Maverick" when it comes to hockey. Because he usually fails in his attempts to be shocking.

Except here... here JR is quite the shocker.

And finally. Just because I wanted an excuse to post it.

The Kings are back in action Saturday afternoon against the Detroit Red Wings. A win sets a new Kings franchise record for most consecutive wins... 9. I've been to a lot of memorable Kings games in my 20+ years of being a Kings fan... but I can honestly say I never thought I'd be at one like this. Half Season Ticket Holder Buddy and I will be there at Staples Center in the sea of red... and we'll be hoping that number 9 is fine.

So thank god this Ilya Kovalchuk madness is over... and I can go back to reading what people are having for lunch on Twitter instead of wasting my time with countless Kovy updates from people just re-tweeting each other. From a media standpoint, I have to say Atlanta Thrashers GM Don Waddell, really played this well. He let the press know that Kovalchuk was up for sale, he aired the dirty laundry of what offers were on the table for a contract and when it was all said and done... he issued a letter to the fans.

See that guy on the left? Awkward.

As you can see, when the letter was first released on the official Atlanta Thrashers NHL site... they hadn't gotten around to taking the photos of Kovy off the site. Now, the site has been updated to reflect the loss of 5 time 40+ goal scorer.

As I type this right now... the internet is exploding with rumors of prized free agent Ilya Kovalchuk being traded to any number of teams. Since the Los Angeles Kings are included in this madness (for the record, Half Season Ticket Holder Buddy and I are in the "no trade without a new contract" camp)... I started thinking of what it would be like to have Kopi and Kovy on the same team. I think it would go something like this.

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I don't think I was ever going to type these words in my lifetime... but it looks like we should know in the next few hours if 5 time 40+ goal scorer Ilya Kovalchuk has been traded to the Kings. Gulp!